Few more months and our eldest will be born. We are ecstatic about the thought of a growing family and one night, during our daily “us” time, my husband opened up a problem that other couples have – the lack of time when the baby comes. He told me a story where the husband felt neglected. He said that the couple has been waiting for the baby, for the longest time and so, when they got pregnant, they almost exploded with happiness. But he didn’t expect that along with the shift in their priorities, he will be put aside as well. He said that the wife focused on the new born (which is to be expected) because he is so little that he needs every ounce of care…We do not know every detail in the story like, if the wife is back in the office, or is full time at home but is swamped with house work and so, we just assumed.
We have our own chores in our household and during the late months of my pregnancy, he started taking over some of mine. He makes sure that I get more rest, especially during those days when I felt like I ran in a marathon. We told ourselves that we shall continue this even after childbirth, just so we will have time to spend with each other. We are aware that when the baby is born, he will be the center of attention and not us. But it would be nice to sometimes go back to the times when it is just the couple. “Us” time need not be grand for there is beauty in simplicity.
Yes, our child is a gift and that they will get most of our time during their developing years.But we should also remember that our spouse is as important. Our priorities should be (after marriage) God, our spouse, our child, and others. Take a moment to breathe when ever you feel overwhelmed by the situation. Go back to how your relationship started. How you fell in love, grew in love and became one. Remember back then when the two of you made sure you had time for each other? Why should now be any different? Living in the same home doesn’t mean that you do not have to make time.
I remember two years ago when I told my husband (my then friend) not to court me. I told him to court me instead, when we are together. He said that at first it felt weird and somewhat complicated. I told him it really isn’t. I am simple girl and since we are friends for almost 9 years, it will be easy for him. And guess what? He is still courting me even after we got married last February. We still do the things that we used to do, we still talk about anything and the only difference now is that we do not have to part ways when it is time to go home. 🙂 You see, dating does not have to stop after the “I do.” This and praying together will surely make everyday easier, more enjoyable and of course, filled with love.